She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
whose ass print is on the piano?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
