Non-Jews are for practice
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
