This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
