Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
