What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
