im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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