Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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