My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
