You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
