The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
