i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
My dad is sitting where you rode me
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
