phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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