Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
