The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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