i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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