So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
