In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
