I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
