i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
