you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
