"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
