just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
