Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
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