This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
