does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
