Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
