Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
