Little spoons don't ask big questions
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
