So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I love you.
Bad choice
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
