Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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