North Korea, Best Korea!
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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