I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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