Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
