So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
