is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
God gave him joint rollers for hands
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
