And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
