youre lurking in front of me
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize