did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
