i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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