I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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