Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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