I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize