sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
