Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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