toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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