I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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