You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
