Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
