How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Randomize
