Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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