drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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