Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
he just fucked me for my cheese.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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